Hospital Life
It's Day 26 in the hospital with our sweet foster baby. My heart goes out to families who spend months of their lives in the hospital with a sick child. I've never thought much about what that must be like before all of this. It's an alternate universe.
Then there's taking care of a sick child who's not yours. I have to say that the team of doctors and nurses here have been amazing. They have involved us in every decision made even though technically we have no real authority in all of this. They are encouraging and supportive and they thank us every single day for taking care of her. Let's practice gratitude people...it goes a long way!
I want to make it clear that as her foster family we totally support reunification with her biological family. That is our job, no matter how heartbreaking it feels. And as is the case in many fostering situations we are hated by the bio family. I don't use the word hate lightly but when you're staring at it face to face...well it is what it is. There are many complicated factors that have made this hospital stay emotionally exhausting.
Visiting hours are set by DHHS. We are forced to leave for hours while her bio family visits. There have been days when the baby has been so sick and so distressed and only wants us. But we leave because that's part of "our job". We leave her in the arms of people who to her are strangers. And sometimes we leave and the family never shows up and she's alone. But we have to leave because there is a legit risk of a physical confrontation should we run into each other. That's reality for us. For privacy reasons I cannot go into details but there are some significant cultural and religious issues at war here.
On a positive note I've grown a backbone in all of this. I can go into a meeting unintimidated by birth parents who are glaring at me because I am the enemy. My introverted self has decided that how they feel about me doesn't matter. What matters is that this baby is safe and loved and we are the blessed ones who get to be a part of her life for however long God determines.
In closing, find someone today who feels unlovable...and show them that they are not.
Then there's taking care of a sick child who's not yours. I have to say that the team of doctors and nurses here have been amazing. They have involved us in every decision made even though technically we have no real authority in all of this. They are encouraging and supportive and they thank us every single day for taking care of her. Let's practice gratitude people...it goes a long way!
I want to make it clear that as her foster family we totally support reunification with her biological family. That is our job, no matter how heartbreaking it feels. And as is the case in many fostering situations we are hated by the bio family. I don't use the word hate lightly but when you're staring at it face to face...well it is what it is. There are many complicated factors that have made this hospital stay emotionally exhausting.
Visiting hours are set by DHHS. We are forced to leave for hours while her bio family visits. There have been days when the baby has been so sick and so distressed and only wants us. But we leave because that's part of "our job". We leave her in the arms of people who to her are strangers. And sometimes we leave and the family never shows up and she's alone. But we have to leave because there is a legit risk of a physical confrontation should we run into each other. That's reality for us. For privacy reasons I cannot go into details but there are some significant cultural and religious issues at war here.
On a positive note I've grown a backbone in all of this. I can go into a meeting unintimidated by birth parents who are glaring at me because I am the enemy. My introverted self has decided that how they feel about me doesn't matter. What matters is that this baby is safe and loved and we are the blessed ones who get to be a part of her life for however long God determines.
In closing, find someone today who feels unlovable...and show them that they are not.
You, my friend, fill my heart with pride and love. Crazy H.
ReplyDelete❤ we were just talking about you today with a nursing student - came up when we were discussing Ricky and his devious behavior 😉
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